Need is the Necessity of All Invention!

My journey began back in high school when my maternal grandmother came to stay with us. My mom was busy running her business, and as any independent woman in her early 40s would attest, it’s not easy to start something new at that stage in life. That’s a story for another day, though. What’s crucial here is how her journey inadvertently kickstarted mine—in the kitchen.

A family thrives when everyone works together, and I stepped in where I could. It all started humbly with Maggi (aka ramen) and tea. I have always preferred soupy Maggi, over the dry version, though I know many of you might disagree. My initiation into cooking also meant preparing the quintessential evening tea. In most Indian households, chai-time between 4 and 5 PM is non-negotiable. Chai with biscuits is life itself.

Initially, my mom tried to make it home for lunch and prepare tea herself, but work often came first. That’s where I stepped in, and the kitchen became my experimental lab. I’ll admit, many horrible tea experiments were served during this phase. But one thing about Indian households—food is rarely wasted. If it wasn’t outright ruined (like with spoiled milk), it was consumed. My grandmother, a staunch vegetarian in her 80s, often bore the brunt of these experiments. Some days the tea was diluted, other days too dark, and occasionally bitter. However, on rare occasions, I got it just right. Gradually, I mastered masala chai with elaichi (cardamom), and that marked a turning point.

But tea alone can’t fill an empty stomach. My grandmother, who didn’t eat onion or garlic, needed a suitable accompaniment. That’s when I perfected the soupy Maggi and coaxed her to try a spoon. The added pepper soothed her sore throat, and to my delight, she loved it. It soon became a staple for her, much to the shock of my aunts and uncles, who had long tried and failed to expand her dietary preferences. Such is the power of grandchildren—we can often do what others can’t!

This success marked the beginning of my culinary journey. My experiments expanded over time. Starting with South Indian staples like dosa, pongal, coconut rice, lemon rice, and an array of sambars and rasams, I gradually ventured into other cuisines. North Indian dishes like rajma, paneer gravies, and parathas—stuffed with methi, cheese, onion, or aloo—were next. I even dabbled in momos, red sauce pasta, and pizzas. Ravioli, however, remains my Everest; I’ve yet to master making it from scratch.

In this process, I discovered a newfound love for mushrooms and started incorporating them wherever they fit. Cooking, for me, became more than a necessity; it became a life skill, one that added immense value to my independence. While I cherish the idea of someone cooking for me with love and care, I’m grateful that I’m not dependent on anyone for my meals.

However, this skill remains largely unexplored by many, particularly men in traditional Indian households. While driving and swimming are often considered critical life skills, cooking is seen as optional for boys. Should moms insist their sons learn to cook? Absolutely. The previous generation’s gender roles in cooking have left gaps that we can and should bridge. After all, life skills, including cooking, are for everyone.

Sometimes, I feel regretful when I see colleagues or friends who lack this basic skill and rely entirely on restaurants and takeout. While external food sources can be convenient and hygienic in some cases, they fail in many others. Ultimately, self-reliance is difficult to attain, but it is invaluable. Many may argue that cooking is not a critical life requirement, especially when there are greater milestones to achieve. I agree to an extent—but ask yourself, would you be able to manage if left alone?

Learning to cook not only allows us to prepare nutritious and affordable meals, but it also saves time and money in the long run. More importantly, cooking fosters bonding with loved ones while giving us control over wholesome ingredients.

Most of us have complicated food habits, yet we often eat more than necessary—breakfast, lunch, snacks, dinner, and countless cups of tea or coffee. Can we simplify our meals? Can we reduce unnecessary consumption or introduce healthier substitutes that keep us full for longer?

You don’t have to cook everything from scratch daily. Pre-planning meals and preparing ingredients in advance—such as chopping vegetables over the weekend or using store-bought pre-cut produce—can make life easier. Finding small windows for cooking is often more feasible than dedicating an entire hour or more to meal prep.

On exhausting days, give yourself a break. Order in, or switch to simple meals like poha and upma. Cooking should be a balance—nourishing, fulfilling, and, above all, manageable.

Ultimately, cooking is not just about survival—it’s about self-sufficiency, creativity, and connection. Whether you’re preparing a comforting home-cooked meal or experimenting with new flavors, the kitchen is a space of endless possibilities. Embracing this skill can lead to a healthier lifestyle, a deeper appreciation for food, and a stronger bond with those around you. So, take that first step, start simple, and enjoy the journey—because every meal tells a story.